The house is finally packed away, the children in the car waiting anxiously for us to get in. I snapped a few pictures of the empty house with a small fear that it could look completely different once we return. At this point it was irrelevant we made the decision to leave and experience a whole new life willing to risk it all. The weight of worries seemed to get lighter already.
We left Tubac at 11 AM, a small feeling of sadness and anxiety kept me speechless for a while. Am I being true to myself? Will I survive the closeness? The lack of independence? The frustrations of not meeting my husband’s , my kid’s and my own expectations? The fear of drowning, sinking, running out of water, being struck by a lightning, eaten by a shark, all the unknown, but mainly the girls getting hurt. It overcome my thought after I decide to leave it up to God, so far everything that I have experience seemed to have a purpose and a good ending.
Samantha breaks the silence from the back sit and asks to be schooled while driving; “Mom, school already started a long time ago, can you do it now?” I have to overcome the idea of school as a pen, a textbook and a blackboard. School must be a place with learning opportunities, the car is not bad, she has the attention she needs and we carry enough material to keep them stimulated. However, by the time we made it to San Diego, if I were to paint the scene, Trini would be electrified and holding on to the ceiling of the car and Sami with her legs up the sit, head hanging and making her leaps roll with her fingers.
We just got an extra hour, we need it! We are at the Marina, there are two nice restaurants, both offering live music, the lights are reflected on the water, the smell of the ocean is energizing. The excitement is back!! We haven’t seen the boat in person, we want to know what our house for the next year will be!. We walked and walked and walked. The boat is far back on A dock. The docks are narrow, I can only picture tripping and falling in the cold water with my camera hanging on my shoulder.
We are here, a nice poinsettia is waiting for us at the table in the salon, A welcome present from Matt’s dad. It made it cozy. The boat is what I expected except for the storage. The back of our truck is loaded with boxes and bags of clothes, but the boat is already full, every single compartment is in used. All sorts of items such as tools, sails, life jackets, blankets, cleaning supplies from the 60s and more. I started feeling depressed. Where am I going to put our stuff? I was overwhelmed and tired. I needed to sleep.
I woke up this morning with one girl on each side, my back was killing me. I guess it is because I am unable to move during the night if they sleep with me. It seems to be the common factor to my nights of back pain. Emotionally I was recharged! We had a light breakfast, organized a few things and Samantha asked again to be schooled. We grab a cup of coins and did a little math. The rest of the schooling we will call “practical life”. It was time to go to the showers. This seems to be a fun experience for them. I enjoy it too. The water is always warm, the lighting is perfect and the cleaning is done by someone else.
It was a non stopped day, a couple trips to the car, scrubbing, scrubbing in the galley, arranging and rearranging, Matt reassembling instruments, I will trust his ability to do it, but I have paid attention to the shapes and colors of the equipment he takes apart so if for the next couple of days I keep seeing the same shapes and colors I will get worried. He is very talented in these matters. The girls are sitting at the dock finding their own entertainment. They used trash as treasure and Sami built a robot called Captain XX.
They got in the dinghy and practice rowing; I could only hear them giggling and Matt complimenting Samantha’s ability to maneuver the boat. I was then proud of our decision to turn off the TV back home and do this.
We took the kids for ice cream and Sami bought a postcard to send to school. She wrote “my bed is tiny, I went to the park and the day was kind of boring” I told her that she needed to write something more positive. I felt a little frustrated that she was feeling like that. After I made my suggestion, which was not very well taken, she became very sad and said she wanted to go home. Trini yelled “you are home”. It didn’t seem to help. She then bang her head on a door and that made her scream with strength. I would have jumped overboard. Matt so patiently consoled her and calmed her. He took them for a ride in the dinghy and when they returned everything was back to normal.
We had a nice dinner. Played a game of UNO, had chocolates for dessert, listen to some Jazz, the girls did some art and then everyone went to bed.
Things are starting to take form, I am seeing the light in terms of storage and I like it. Now I am wondering how deceitful the life in the marina could be, will the real experience begin once we untie from the docks and electricity, water, showers, and social life becomes limited. I pray that I and the boat are up to that test. Matt and the girls will for sure.